Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Thank You Fall!

Autumnal Diorama
American Museum of Natural History
~ New York City ~

Thank you wikipedia
for giving me the name of someone else (like me)
who photographed this mural,
but not the name of the actual artist.
[I took the above photo on 2 June 2011 ~ my son Ben's 21st birthday]

Comedian Jimmy Fallon is the funniest when he writes his ridiculous yet heartfelt "thank you notes" on Friday nights, always to the tune of sappy background music.

Today is perfect for a couple of my seasonal favorites:

"Thank you Fall,
for arriving this week.
I was really getting tired of Summer's bull---t." *

from Thank You Notes 1


"Thank you Fall,
for occasionally going by the name 'Autumn' --
just like my cousin Megan who became a stripper."

from Thank You Notes 2

A few more favorites:

Thank you . . . F12 button on my on my keyboard. What is it you do again? Oh, that's right --nothing.

Thank you . . . the name Lloyd, for starting with two Ls. I'm glad both those Ls were there, because otherwise I would have called you "Loyd."

Thank you . . . lasers, for being spelled with an "s" even though you'd be totally more badass if you were spelled with a "z." Just sayin'.

Thank you . . . people with sesquipedalophobia, which is the fear of long words. Your picked the wrong thing to call your fear.

Thank you nickels, for being the redheaded stepchild of the coin community. You're so thick, yet you're worth so little. You're like the quarter's fatter, less successful brother.

Thank you . . . fun - size candy, for calling yourself "fun" to distract me from the fact that you're smaller than regular candy. Nice try. They should call you "disappointment - size candy."

Thank you . . . horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. (I'm looking at you, too, Grape Nuts.) [I think he should have also included "Pineapple"!]

* I'm reminded here of Anne Lamott's characterization of Summer as "the teenage season -- too much energy, too much growth and beauty and heat and late nights, none of them what they are cracked up to be" (see my previous post "Buckle Up!").

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